What to do when your options feel limited
Written by Alex Poeter
Feeling stuck usually comes from believing that we have limited choices, and not being satisfied with those choices.
Sometimes we feel that the options available to us are imposed on us, and we believe that we have to choose between the lesser of two evils, neither of which would make us happy. This can create pressure: if our mind feels it has limited options to choose from, it starts to become reactive. And the more it freaks out, the more our anxiety increases. As a result, we try to find a way out by using our rational mind: we over-analyze or make lists of pros and cons. However, these attempts are usually futile because when we’re reactive, we don’t have access to our higher faculties, such as creative problem solving.
I’ve seen people make big life decisions from a place of limitation, fear, and scarcity. But if we act from a place of limitations, our outcomes end up reflecting those qualities. What if, instead, you could see new possibilities? Here are some perspectives and approaches I’ve found quite helpful in these situations.
The first step is to become aware. When we’re caught up in a perspective that feels limiting to us - even if it’s just subconsciously - we often don’t even know what the cause of that feeling is. We just notice that something doesn’t feel right, so we react and try to protect ourselves. That’s why it’s important to be aware that whenever we feel this way, we’re likely caught up in a limiting perspective that might not be true. Instead of just reacting to the unpleasant feeling, take a step back so you can see more objectively the limiting perspective you’re caught up in. Just this step alone can change your entire experience because it allows you to shift your perspective from perceived limitation to greater possibility.
Next, understand that when we’re caught up in reactive behavior, we’re not showing up as proactive and deliberate creators. We don’t even see the option to respond to a situation, which the mind perceives as limited, from a place of greater possibility and creativity. That’s why it’s important to remind ourselves that we have more power in these situations than our conditioned mind has us believe. While we can’t control circumstances or the behavior of others, we do have the ability to tap into our resourcefulness, creativity, and inner wisdom.
The last step is to use your power as a deliberate creator, which can be done by:
Doing an activity to get into a calm state of mind.
Reflecting on open-ended questions, such as “What new options can I see when I let go of my fears and doubts for a moment?” or “What new options become visible when I allow myself to have it all?”
Letting go of trying to force things and waiting until we feel inspired to do something that feels truly good to us.
We’re all powerful creators with access to tremendous resourcefulness, creativity, and wisdom: How can you keep reminding yourself of your true power?